Icebreakers

There couldn't be anything more classic than the classically "contrived" icebreaker. Call me a butthead but there's no single tip to cracking the ice with any woman but spontaneity. Ian, one of the coolest guys I know (butter-faced, guy-wise), doesn't have to contrive anything to get women to talk to him anyway he wishes. Maybe he does know what makes the chiquita bananas tick, regardless of how skinny he is, by simply not thinking too much about trying to break the ice. I've circumlocuted, I know. But the clear meaning is: Don't push it.

Icebreakers are for the bold. If you're the shy type, you might as well start practicing now or you'll wilt like the leaves in Arizona summer when facing the most gorgeous girl in town. I still believe asking what the girl does on weekends is too lame. What comes naturally is often just a simple straight look - that's about as sincere an icebreaker you can make without saying anything. Some guys would rather babble than make eye contact. I won't blame them - cracking the ice with the dames is too risky!

Sure, guys get rejected. This is exactly the reason why they won't take the effort to beef themselves up psychologically when it's the wrong woman with the right pick-up line. It's cool to be honest right away, though. For example, you'd have to sense whether the girl is single if she has a ring or not on her finger. (Of course, you should know her pretty name first). If you can't see that, you can ask her right away. The interest you show can be overwhelming. This is spontaneous, and far more convincing than any other.

I was with my sister last night and we were talking about our dream dates. Like any woman, she also dreams of dating a celebrity. It's just a dream anyway so there's nothing bad here. She had five celebrities that she wants to date given the opportunity. First on her list was basketball superstar Kobe Bryant. Yes, you heard it right, Kobe Bryant. My sister finds him so damn hot despite those issues against him. Next was Superman lead star Brandon Routh. She told me she finds the actor very neat-looking. She fantasizes of leaning on his broad shoulder just for one time. Third was men's tennis top ranked Roger Federer of Switzerland. She thought the tennis court was the perfect place for them to date. Maybe Federer can teach her how to do the backhand, with the tennis racket of course.

Another celebrity that my sister would love to date was Jessica Alba's leading man in the movie "Into the Blue." My sister and I first saw Walker in the film The Fast and the Furious. Jessica was so fortunate to have him as his leading man in that movie and my sister can only dream of taking over Alba. To my surprise, her numero uno was the football icon David Beckham. Personally, Beckham is a good player but I find him too metrosexual. Plus, his British accent and speaking voice irritates me a little. Although I have to give it to this dude for getting tons of endorsements and snagging Posh.

Have you experienced watching a basketball game together with your boyfriend? What a unique way to date right? But I tell you, there is more unique than that. Last month, I watched an NBA game between the Dallas Mavericks and San Antonio Spurs. It was a very good game, because my favorite team won. I enjoyed it and the other sidecourt events. What I mean by sidecourt events is the happenings at the crowd. Before the game started, I saw this sexy Jennifer Aniston-look alike with her boyfriend. They were holding each others arm when they passed my seat. They sat two seats away from me, that's why I noticed every little thing that they did.

During the second half of the game, I saw the girl stood up. During that time, Manu Ginobili was going to the freethrow line. She was one of those who cheered Ginobili. She was shouting this three words seating beside her. Not contented, she shouted "Marry me." I almost laughed at her but I controlled it. Then I asked myself, "Is she serious?" She's asking Manu to marry her although she knew that her boyfriend is just sitting next to her. Well, if she's kidding, that's not a good joke! She continued shouting for Ginobili till the end of the game. She was so loud to the point that people looked at her. But at the end of the game, I saw her crying. And you know what, her boyfriend was hugging her. I could hardly hear the words from the guy "Don't worry honey, they will bounce back."

Dating is a great way to meet people. In dating, you're free to know the person in a fun environment. You can talk about any thing, but you have to tickle her interest, too. However, if this is your first time to date a girl, what will you do to start the conversation and not to spoil the night?

Offer her great wine. Some women prefer to drink wine when dating. They find it simple, sociable, and stylish occasion. You can always start by asking her favorite wine. Then, get that drink for her. This way, you will start the conversation in casual and liberal way. You can choose the exquisite Vibe Hotel in Rushcutters Bay, Sydney as your romantic location. Both of you can enjoy the overlooking Rushcutters Bay, while drinking your wine.

With a perfect place and good wine, your first date will surely be memorable. There are other icebreaker ideas that you can think about. You may start with her favorite movie, perhaps. But whatever your topic, make sure that you will treat her special. And, that's the secret in dating a woman.

During dates, awkward silences are inevitable. You come to a point wherein you have no idea what to say next. You lose all possible ideas to come up with in your conversation. You just can't avoid certain dating situations like that. Good conversations make your date all the more meaningful and warm. Just imagine being on a date with neither of you talking or you don't have any single thing to talk about. Man! That has got to suck.

I think that you don't have to be totally in sync with each other just to talk about things. Having a lot of differences, actually make conversations even more interesting and fun. You get to share your own opinions and at the same time you can freely debate on certain issues. I like to talk about music and movies when I'm on a date. It's just the best way to break the ice.

I remember hitting it off with my date when I brought up my liking for the Oasis band. I once had a date and we both liked the best suspense movie, Silence of the Lambs! Both your creative minds would perfectly blend when you talk about things like this. Whether you agree or disagree with each other, it's the best icebreaker.

Dating can be exciting, nerve-wracking, fulfilling, and frustrating all at the same time. The main purpose of date is not to get laid but to get to know the person you are dating. Friendship and love may develop in exploring the personality of your date. Date, in a sense, is personality rating. You assess the personality of your date and at the same time you are also being evaluated. The ultimate purpose of a date is to find the person who can be your lifetime partner.

Ideally, formal dating should be in gourmet food restaurants. The tranquil and sophisticated ambience of gourmet restaurants help develop romantic mood. Dinner date in a restaurant is more formal and will allow you to converse. It is easier if you are dating a long time acquaintance or friend. The rapport is relatively more established. However, if you are dating a newly met acquaintance, then it could be a bit tricky. Breaking the ice in a formal date can be as nerve-wracking as asking a girl to a date. You can break the ice by first talking about casual things such as your work or the weather. Just do not overdo it. Do not act as if on a job interview or presenting a weather report.

First dates are crucial. If you are planning to have a steady relationship with your date, you'd better make sure you talk about the essentials before taking it to the next step.

Avoid those awkward silences by keeping a few questions in mind to ask her when you take her out to lunch or dinner. Make her open up to you. The key is, ask her the questions you would want her to ask you too.

The safest topic would be her family. Ask her about where she grew up, what her family is like, how many siblings she has. Is her family big? Are her parents divorced? When did she learn how to drive? Who taught her? Basically, talk about her family. For sure, she'll ask you about yours too. Speak honestly about where you came from and all the funny family memories you have. Skip the negatives. Tell her about it on some other dates. Keep the conversation light.

After families, you move on to high school and college. Laugh about the silly things you both did with your high school sweethearts. Giggle at the adventures you both did with your exes back in college. As much as possible, talk nice about your exes but don't make it sound that they are nicer than she is. Make sure she won't feel threatened by your past relationships.

It is inevitable that you talk about your recent exes. Again, talk about how nice they are but this time, point out the problems you've had with the previous relationship. Talk about it but don't dwell on it as she might think you're still hung-up on the ex. Again, try to point out the funny aspects of the problems you've had. If she talks about her ex, listen and take note.

These topics will surely make you both open up more to each other. Make sure you make her feel that you are sincerely interested in her.

The only time you're going to get to open a conversation with almost anyone is when you know how to break the ice so naturally that they wouldn't mind speaking to you too. Don't ask too serious questions, questions that are too corny your date will gag behind her back. Don't ask about her past relationship when you're not yet too comfy with each other. In fact, it would make you even more appealing if you ask non-neutral but light and positive questions such as "Are you from around here?" when you meet for the first time in a grocery store.

You will increase your appeal more if you show that you are naturally interested and you look them in the eye. This is to show how honest you are and passionate about knowing other people.

Pugs are a cross between a still-born bulldog and a bat. They're bred as toy dogs and are rather useless when it comes to street brawls. But pugs are faithful creatures. They may be ugly and small but they are as valiant as any breed of dog; women know this. So next time you decide to bring a rented dog to the park, don't bring a Collie, bring a pug.

Pugs are great objects of conversations, especially during the first stages of "getting to know you." Collies are too beautiful to make a woman comfortable, and retrievers are too distracting. You didn't go to the park to throw Frisbee at the dog; you're here to meet someone nice. The pug will help you. Just bring a pug along, the uglier the better. The unique pug trot provokes the maternal instincts of women to surface, and here's where you come in.

Meeting new people is the point of dating, whether you're online or not. Going dancing or hanging out at a bar also offers you a chance to know more people from outside your circle of family and friends.

You see that gorgeous brunette or that sexy redhead sitting by the bar, and you know you've just got to try to at least talk to her. But how to start?

You can use an icebreaker. An icebreaker is a line, a joke or a comment used to put two people who have just met at ease with each other. Delivering an icebreaker, especially a good one, requires skill, daring and supreme self-confidence (if you already possess these, maybe you don't need an icebreaker after all).

Using an icebreaker is no guarantee of success, however. It's best to just roll with the punches and go with it. Dwelling on rejection only makes it worse, and remember, it's not how many times you fall, it's how many times you get up that matters.